To answer these questions myself, I really agree with what these people said, but in my own words:
Some of these questions, I honestly can't see anyone having ever asked... except maybe another future convict at the courthouse.
-When did you decide to be Transgender?
It is Not really a decision; my feminine soul has always been inside and right in front of me throughout my whole life. The better question would be, when did the reality smack you to realize your true internal, gender identity? LOL
Honestly, I have no issue with this response, as I don't regard being transgender as a decision one makes either. One makes the decision to transition, but not to be transgender.
-Which bathroom do you use?
Gender neutral restrooms are good. But damned either way; I am using the restroom of My choice, and I exercise my Rights to the facility that better suits Me. On that, I really hate the Urinals; not only unsanitary on the splash back, but Lack of better privacy! Ugh!
Okay, this is one area that I have an issue with Chris on and I hate myself for having this issue but I have to make my statement clear. Before I went full-time (and I decided to go full-time when my name change came through, because I would be able to get an ID that has a proper name and gender marker), I used the male restroom - not because I wanted to but I didn't want the drama and I felt it would be inappropriate to do so until I went full-time. The only time I've ever seen anyone get harassed when attempting to use a restroom was a cis (... I'm pretty sure, though I have been wrong before) lesbian friend of mine in Boulder trying to use the women's restroom. This happened a few years ago at the Boulder Transit Centre and it was one of the security guards doing the harassment.
My point is, Chris, you have no business in the women's restroom until you go full-time and somehow, I don't think you've reached that threshold yet.
-Have you had the op?
No, but I am considering it for in the future. If I can afford it. But not big a hurry; less than 20% of transgenders have their ops. And I am exploring making the best of this body for Any Woman born with a vagina.
Better do it soon, before you go to prison. Just saying. Plus, it's transgender people, not "transgenders", you ignorant motherfucker. You could afford it if you go to Thailand for your surgery (and you might be able to skirt the therapy requirements that would keep you off the operating table Stateside).
-How do you have sex?
Like most anyone; traditional and lesbian; my mind is open to the preferences of my partner(s) during the time. But not for the voyers; keep out.
So, in other words, not at all unless you're paying for the privilege. The way I would answer that question is "none of your business, pervert".
-Are you a drag queen?/Difference between (trans) vestite and gender?
I'd go on stage and perform; I am very comfortable in my feminine wardrobe. But I AM a transgender; I totally and truly identify as the woman and lesbian soul I have been. The transvestites, gays enjoying the dresses and skirts with male mindsets. I do not judge, but I do set myself apart as an individual.
*hums to self* I've got a fish, would you like to make a wish? I've got a fish, would you like to make a wish? I've got a fiiiiiiiish
Oh, where were we? Ah yes. You don't have the talent to perform. Unless you're planning to make more progressively insane YouTube videos. If you want to make money, you need to embrace your status as an Internet lolcow. Get on YouTube and monetize the hell out of your videos. Open a Patreon account. But I digress.
Let me answer this question in the best way I know how. I honestly believe that Chris is both under the transgender umbrella and yet, not transgender. This is kinda confusing, so I'll explain. I believe this primarily because he has vacillated between identifying as male and as sorta female. If you don't know or if you're going back and forth like this, you shouldn't transition. At best, you should talk it out with a therapist and figure out your next move. When I made the decision to transition, I was 100% sure I'm a woman and every step I took along that path, from getting on hormones to getting to the operating table, has brought me more joy in my life. There is no other way that I could have lived my life other than to suffer through it and live the lie that I was male.
Additionally, I didn't start dressing as female until I got my legal documents in order. I wanted to make sure my identity documents matched with my outward presentation. At that time, I was taking hormones that were prescribed to me by a doctor six months prior. In contrast, Chris has been dressing in his "tomgirl" persona for over a year. Even the term "tomgirl" seems to imply that he identifies as male but is wearing traditionally female clothing as it is a CWCism of the word "tomboy". It is for this reason that I believe that Chris is a transvestite. However, transvestites are often included in the transgender umbrella (not sure why) so he's in this weird semipermeable membrane where he both is and is not transgender.
-Are you sure you're not just gay?
I am One Hundred Percent Positive that I am fully into Women, and I feel most at ease around them in good Friendship. With the Drag Queens, I am good with being in good friendship as well, as long as we have mutual respects of our respective preferences. They can have their men, I will most enjoy the company of the women, gal pals, girl friends (with or without benefits, and my sweetheart to come from one of them or whatever.
Okay, Chris, if you are truly female-identified as you (sometimes) say you are, then your statement that you are "fully into Women" means that yes, you are gay. Unless you are also into men, which would make you bisexual.
-Do I call you he, she, them?
Get the clue from our individual attire and self-presentations. If you were mistaken, it is alright. There is no shame or embarrassment in asking; it shows respect from you, and we all appreciate the respect very much.
I have no issue with this answer or this approach, but I would say instead that if you are unsure of someone's preferred pronouns, ask.
-Would you ever go back?
NO. I felt depressed with being male; it was just not me. Plus, it is like that phrase, "Once you go black, you can't go back." I will Not ever deny any of my past; it built and strengthened me and my character as a person and individual.
Chris, this is why I don't want you to transition and I think you're doing it for all the wrong reasons. You need to see a therapist because I think there may be comorbid psychological issues that are keeping you from happiness. When I was going through my transition, I didn't want to see a therapist because I felt that the Standards of Care were incredibly pedantic and treated transgender people as though we didn't deserve to make our own medical decisions. However, when I see people like you, I can see the rationale of the Standards of Care. I'm lucky that I was right but I shudder to think of the damage I was doing to my body if I was wrong. I honestly believe that your depression stems more from other issues in your life. You are in your 30s and live with your parents, you are about to go to prison for macing a GameStop employee, you don't have many real friends and you've been trolled to oblivion. I don't doubt that you have depression, Chris, but I seriously think that sorting these issues out may be just as important if not more so than sorting out your gender dysphoria. But what do I know, I'm not a therapist.
There is no doubt that you've weathered some seriously fucked up shit, Chris but I don't think it strengthened your character. I don't think you've grown as an individual, I think you just have your guard up and aren't as easily fooled (or as easily responsive) to trolls as you once were. Plus, you have denied your past before and even lied about your past to different people. The difference is that you can't really lie effectively because anyone can look it up and call you on it.
Plus, you misunderstand that phrase "once you go black, you can't go back"... unless it was a subtle hint to the man in the pickle suit...
-Can I see a photo (of how you looked before)?
Sure! No denial or hiding there. Google my name; Lots of my older photos on the freaking Internet.
And this is why I took great pains to try to destroy every trace of my old identity as I possibly could before I started my transition.
-I can tell...
Whatever. You are not the "boss" of me. Go pick on one of your Bully friends. Then, you might actually get punched in the jaw in response. I do what makes me happy, or at least feel better.
Chris, as someone who actually is transgender, I do want people to let me know if there is something about me that they can "read". But then again, not everyone is the same.
-Can I feel your boobs?
Maybe, but it would depend on my mood and situation at the face-to-face, in person, time. My lower privates are off limits, without my own consent.
Who the fuck would ask you that?
Have a good and safe day.Don't drop the soap.